What is a Dad?

He is someone who loves a child, long before they exist.
He is someone who hopes for a child.
He is someone who prepares for a child.
He is someone who sacrifices for a child.
He is someone who is overjoyed to see two pink lines.
He is someone who falls in love with a heartbeat.

He is someone who holds his wife’s hand when the doctor says something is wrong.
He is someone who hopes for the best.
He is someone who fights for his son’s life.
He is someone who sits beside her while tests are run, and procedures are done.
He is someone who sees her pain, and stays by her side through it all.
He is someone who cries with his wife when the doctor says there is no hope.
He is someone who stands up for his unborn child.

He is someone who remains hopeful, when all hope seems lost.
He is someone who plans for life.
He is someone who cares for his wife while she nurtures their child.
He is someone who sleeps on a hospital bench.
He is someone who stays by her side as the contractions come.
He is someone who wipes her brow and whispers, “It will be okay”.

He is someone who thinks his son is the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.
He is someone who makes a choice no parent should ever have to.
He is someone who bathes his son and dresses him.
He is someone who watches his wife hold their son, knowing his life will be short.
He is someone who holds his son, knowing it will be the only time.

Hoppers
He is someone who shares his son’s short life with others.
He is someone who helps his wife lay their baby in a bassinet, for the only time.
He is someone who watches his son be wheeled away.

He is someone who cries with his wife as their hearts are forever broken.
He is someone who chooses a tiny white casket.
He is someone who plans a funeral.
He is someone who makes a video of his son’s short life to share with the world.
He is someone who holds her when their world is buried in the cold dark ground.

He is someone who grieves with her.
He is someone who sits with her in the dark, no matter how long it takes.
He is someone who is honest about his grief.
He is someone who will never let his son be forgotten.
He is someone who cares more about his son than making others comfortable.
He is someone who accepts that life will never be the same.

He is someone who continues to hope.
He is someone who makes her laugh, when all she wants to do is cry.
He is someone who looks to the future, while remembering the past.
He is someone who loves his son, then, now and forever.

He is my beloved husband, and the most amazing daddy to our son.

Alex Hopper
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Alex Hopper is a freelance writer living in North Carolina. She has been happily married to Trent for 7 years. Their son, Cyrus, was diagnosed with a rare fatal birth defect at their 12 week ultrasound. They chose to fight for his life and to carry him with love for as long as they could. He was born on November 25, 2013 at 33 weeks and lived for a precious 1 hour and 9 minutes. They are heartbroken that he is gone but thankful for his life and know that he will never be forgotten. He is their only child. Now Alex chooses to write openly and honestly about her grieving process and hopes that her words will help others feel less alone. She created and writes at Hope in the Heartache, and is a writer for All That Love Can Do.

3 thoughts on “What is a Dad?”

  1. Crying, reading this beautiful piece, as it brought back so many memories of those times for us. We lost our son 3 1/2 years ago and it still hurts so bad sometimes. Thank you for sharing. Xoxo

  2. Alex, I have begun to share your story with another couple. Thank you for being willing to be so open. Bless you both

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