*Original version published here.

What do people really mean when they say,

You are so strong?
You are so brave?

They mean:

You are different than most.
Different than them.

They say maybe you are somehow better equipped to deal with this tragedy.
(Perhaps it’s no coincidence it happened to your family).

Because you are so strong !
You are so brave !

They say to me,

“I couldn’t carry on”.
“I couldn’t do what you do”.
And I’m really wondering what they mean when they say, “it’s amazing that you are still breathing!”

But I was just a mom, among a million others.
Not better, not worthier, no super powers.
I couldn’t save my own daughter.

She was strong.
She was brave.

She lived with a passion and fought like a lion,
And losing her didn’t make me stronger,
But crushed and broken and limping,

A survivor.

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Chloë Sóleyjarmóðir

Chloë is 27, and a high school teacher. But before anything else, she's Soley's mom. Soley was diagnosed at age 3 months with an aggressive kind of brain cancer called ATRT. She showed an amazing fight through months of hospital and chemotherapy, but treatment was ineffective and she died at 11 months. Soley is her only baby, and remains her whole world. You can read about her story on her blog, aboutholland.wordpress.com

Latest posts by Chloë Sóleyjarmóðir (see all)

• Love After Loss – Part II - February 10, 2017
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